Apologies, I frantically write this for two reasons: 1) I want to go to sleep already, and it’s almost 11PM. *insert grandma joke here* and 2) Halloween is right around the corner…I see it every time I turn the corner.

…if you can guess, it’s going to the that kind of post. Yes, it’s going to be SUPER LAME and about LAST-MINUTE HALLOWEEN COSTUMES. If you’re not into Halloween or lame-ness- PLEASE GO AWAY. You may not want to be my friend after this. Let’s go. Use your imagination, you might need it. (Yes.)

Here are my Last-Minute [Lame OR AWESOME] Halloween Costume Ideas:

1. Dress up as an embellished phone. Jewels, everywhere. You are hotline bling. Boom.
2. Wear your hair big and have cat-eye eyeliner. Dress in all black. Your body is the computer below. You’re ADELE. 
3. You can wear normal clothes, but also wear a dress or skirt at your knees. “Did you dress up?” “Yes, I dressed down.” (Anyone? This is pretty literal, and obviously, I wish I had more time to mock up some images.
4. This is my personal favorite, hopefully I can do this myself. If I cannot, I at least shared. Imagine a purple heart-shape, rooted vegetable. But I look a little ill, a little grey and I am holding a box of tissues. I’m a sick beet/beat. Many thanks to Beyonce’s ‘Partition.’
   
   

   damn, someone BEET me to it.

5. You’re a giant question mark. What are you? You’re Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez’s relationship: questionable.
6. Stick a bunch of networks on yourself (i.e. ABC, NBC, AMC, HBO, TNT). What are you? You’re multi-channel. (This one is for those terrible marketing geeks…that would be me, the dummy who came up with this idea in her cubicle.)
7. Find a cardboard and make it like a barrel. You’ll dress it like a peanut butter jar. When you go to a party, you’ll loop the same motion/action. What are you? You’re a GIF. Please don’t argue with how you’re supposed to pronounce it, the founder says, “choosy moms, choose G(J)IF.”
   
8. Wear a flannel and a beanie. Maybe some combat boots? There’s a store that probably has all of the things. Then, have a deck of flash cards that have a bunch of words and their connotation. You’re an urban dictionary.

There you have it. Those are all of my absolutely absurd Halloween costume ideas for you to enjoy/laugh/emulate/inspire to come up with your own. I can’t wait to see what we see this Halloween. OH ANOTHER [SLUTTY] NURSE, great. Tis the season.