It pains my heart to write this.
I stared at the screen for nearly 20 minutes before I actually processed it,
then the emotions came and then the tears followed soon after.
TL;DR: I didn’t get it. I was rejected by Pixar today with an automated e-mail. And yes, I’m shattered.
I will also go ahead and apologize to some of the people I haven’t told personally but probably should have told personally. My heart can’t handle it, and for some reason posting it publicly makes it easier. I think because I can’t handle each separate reaction, whatever they may be. I know I will get pity, I will get empathy, I will get shock, and everything in between.
Right now, I just can’t handle it. Because I’ll hear and read everything that is being said, and none of it is going to register with me quite yet. All I can handle for now is letting y’all know, because I feel like I owe y’all for following me with all of my updates. It’s kind of like closure and me saying thanks again.
Here is my public request for sad songs. I prefer them to be sent on Spotify, but post them anywhere if you feel compelled.
I’m going to feel sad about it, and I don’t feel like I have to justify it. I was aware of my chances, but it doesn’t diminish the fact that I was rejected.
Sometime down the road, I may retitle this as “Semi-final Pixar Update,” because Pixar, this isn’t the last you’ll hear of me. Count on that.
As the Vlog Brothers say, as Caroline reminded me: DFTBA. Don’t Forget To Be Awesome.
Sidebar: I think they are hearing me, listening to me- what are the chances that I write a blog post and they e-mail me the next day?